Sunday, July 08, 2012

Toilet Incident 6th. July 2012

Can I not have a day off?!

Those of you who know me, will know that I occasionally have incidents of getting stuck in toilet cubicles; the most recent (before now) where I got locked in the outside toilet at the Robin hood museum in Sherwood forest, when the handle on the inside came off, and I had to wait until someone came in, to be assisted.. Turned out to be a little boy on that occasion, which was wrong on so many levels...

Anyways...

Here I am at that 'Sunny Travelly Place" in Preston (Customer Site)
On my way out to lunch, I decided I'd take a pee break, and entered the cubicle to suddenly come to a Complete Stop as I got myself wedged between the big, shiny, sticky out toilet roll dispenser and the inward opening door.

"hmm... what the Hell?"

I couldn't move forward or backward, my pockets had got caught on the door and I was stuck and flailing around like an eel on a riverbank as its being clubbed to death with a fluffy cushion!

So, calling on my Ex-Navy seal training, remembering how to cope if I ever got stuck in Quicksand, I resolved to Firstly getting back to being calm! (the squealing like a Telly Tubby wasn't doing me any favours with the occupants of the other cubicles)
I did a quick 'Sherlock Holmes' like scan of the cubicle, to assess the situation, and work out what would aid me in my escape; lots of mathematical equations started to flash into my view, and there it was...

I resorted to standing on one foot (ballerina like) flipping down the toilet seat with my shoe (which shall be incinerated later) standing on said toilet and lifting myself up (thankfully this cubical is on its own, as I have bladder shyness problems, something I'll write about some time) otherwise I'd no doubt have raised myself into the view of an indisposed toilet neighbour who's have no doubt screamed obscenities at me)

Voila... Houdini...

Just like in "The Great Escape", I legged it so as not to reveal my identity to the other fellow occupants!

No comments: