Thursday, May 19, 2016

Walnut Whip

So, as you know, I'm half on one of these "milk-shake" diets at the moment, and after reading this weeks "markisms" you'll know that:

a) I have 3rd degree scalding water burns all over by hands & face from cleaning my "shaker" with hot water (that's not some sort of "in your endo" euphemism by the way)


b) I'm not allowed in the works kitchen anymore..

Well, I'm getting major sugar cravings now, and the wife (Louise) just clocked me having a sneaky "Walnut Whip"

...I figured if I was having one, I may as well go for Gold!!

Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Well.. I didn't see that coming!

Started having these liquid "shake" lunches, and just come to the kitchen to clean it..

I'd forgotten what a colleague had told me NOT to do when cleaning them, and well.. did it anyway..

Filled it half full of BOILING water,
put the springy agitator back in,
screwed the lid on,
pressed down the drinking cap

..and shook it like a bartender making a cocktail...

"Ooh, that's warm" I thought as I  popped the lid..

The content shot out like a 70's Porn star, over everything, Me, the sink and windows!!

Monday, May 16, 2016

Is is still Friday 13th.??

I think today is my Friday 13th:

Elmer Fudd:
mowing back lawn (which was longish in parts, there was a sudden flurry of bits and I realised I'd just mown over a dead baby rabbit (we had a live one in the kitchen earlier this week which we released a good way away) 
This disturbed me somewhat as the "bits" we're still fresh... *Blurgh*

Head ache:
Plugging said lawnmower in to hallway, I managed to head butt the corner of the wall...
(I swear to god, I went blind for a bit!)

Sausage fingers:
Having lunch, wifey put out sausages in an oven tin
Which was BASTARD hot..
I didn't realise.. Obviously

And it's not 12 o'clock yet!!

(addendum 12:02)

Conservatory woes:
Noticed that a couple of end-caps were missing off the conservatory roof, must have dropped into the gutters..
Reach in, feel up and down (blindly as I'm stretching) SHARP STABBING PAIN, something up under nail...
One done, fingertip daddying along the gutter, on tippy toes walking along wall to the next one, and fall forward head butting an open conservatory window... (Again)

I'm going back to bed until June!