Very, very DEEP breath & check ones trousers moment there..
Hanging pictures back up after our recent bout of re-decorating, and I just had a proper, PROPER "Shit myself" moment...
Up a ladder, hanging picture over stairs,
I had 4 brass tacks for the picture hanger.....
And due to this taking much longer than it should I sort of lost count of the brass tacks that I had IN MY MOUTH..
1 "tap tap"
2 "tap tap"
3 "tap tap"
Annnnd...
4 err... Where's tack number 4
Panic set in...
Where the F*ck is tack number 4??
Convinced I'd swallowed it,
Who do you call??
who do I call first??
Panic, panic
Do I go to hospital, after they laugh (surely they've seen this before) what happens?
It's brass so it won't rust?
Do I have to have an operation?
Do I have to check my turds with a knife, fork & magnet for next week?
(Manly telly tubby moment running up & down stairs)
Start gagging Mark, cough, cough dammit!
How do you do a self "Heimlich"
What to do
What to do
Should I run to a neighbour?
No Mark, your 46 not 12!!
Then..... PHEW!!!!
There it is, Under tongue...
Deeeeeep breaths Mark, deep breaths...
Now..
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