Thursday, April 21, 2011

Schooldayz With Henry Cooper

Well... I tell a lie, it obviously wasn't the REAL Henry Cooper (Being an Ex-Navy Seal, I'd have obviously took his ass out!), but read on and all will be revealed!

Basically when anyone went to Art school, they had to trek across the village my high school was in to an old, stone building, which is just about still there to this day, not as an Art school, but a boarded up memory; and they're building Yuppie houses and apartments around it.

Basically, it was probably in the 1st. or 2nd. year, and I was there with 3 of my 'school dayz' mates;

Michael Wellstead,
Wayne McCarthy and
Ian Hopkinson

Now, I was a tyrant at school, and as usual, we were pissing about, when I decided to go to the bog (toilet, for you upper-class foreigners), and wandered off in the direction of the old hallways to the gents; as I glanced behind me I 'thought' i saw Ian get up and follow me, gesturing to the other two, something sinister!

Once out of view, I decided to leg-it, and hide in wait for my victim (Ian); after a few seconds I heard the clip-clop, clip-clop of shoes on the old-stone floors.... lying in wait, I waited, and waited, holding my breath, until out of the corner of my eye, I saw movement, and LAUNCHED myself into the path of the on-comer, shouting some rubbish like 'Boo...' or 'Ugger Bugger'..


It WASN'T Ian!!

It was the Head Teacher at the Art school, Mr. Dekeyne, a tall and quite frightening aura of a Man, who instantly punched me to the chin, knocking any sense I had in my head at that time, through the back of my head... I seem to recall hitting the front doors of the school, and sliding down onto the floor, then vaguely remember being dragged back into the class, and dropped back to my chair where I was ordered to stay for the rest of the day!

Can't quite remember if I ever DID get to the toilet that day or just soiled myself there slumped against the wall...?


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