Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Siamese cats can't paint

I've mentioned in a few of my Stories now the 2 Siamese cats I used to have, "Bastard" & "Shit head"; Well not long after moving into the house we live in now (somewhere around 2003) we'd started on the mammoth task or decorating.

The wife wanted the en-suite doing, sounds glamorous I know, but its about 6x6 foot, and I cant use it because the shower cubicle is too small, (not that I'm fat or anything - I'm an ex-Navy seal remember), that when I bend down for stuff, I tend to bounce my arse off one side of the cubicle, ricocheting and then head-butt the opposite wall on the way back,

Kind of like Pin-ball.... but not as funny...

Anyway, I was painting the roof with a roller (white paint), with the roller tray (full obviously) in one hand, my right foot on the toilet seat, and my other foot (streatched a ways) on a mini-step ladder...

What I 'should' have done was lock the cats downstairs, but I neglected to do that, they came in, saw me, and as affectionate as they were, jumped on the toilet seat and started rubbing my leg (wish the "mrs" was that affectionate), unfortunately, me being stretched from one side of the bathroom to the other, on tippy-toes, mouth agog (in full concentration) trying to roller the roof, and balance a full roller-tray in the other hand I was taken a-back in shock, feeling something rubbing my leg, jumped, my foot went straight through the toilet seat, causing me to be off-balance as I'd now dropped about 8 inches into water (urgh!), I dropped the full paint-tray onto the floor, covering cat number 1"Bastard" who legged it, startling cat number 2 ("Shit head") who bolted through the roller tray, I also then slipped off the step ladder with my other foot finding said roller tray myself, which unfortunately still had some content, "Shit head" taking a vast amount with him on his paws through the bedroom, across the landing, down the stairs.... all of which had new carpet...

The Carpets were Red.... the Paint was White!


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